The Ultimate Adventure Challenge for Couples
I’m going to tell you something I probably shouldn’t… I’m quite bad at most things. I don’t make my bed every morning – or wash my sheets regularly (shhh, don’t tell my boyfriend . I’m no good at...
View ArticleSynergy For the Rest of Us
Something was bugging me recently. It was making me feel irritable, and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. So I spent some time thinking hard about what was up. Finally, the thing that was nagging...
View ArticleCan You Be as Considerate as a Rattlesnake?
Imagine you are leisurely walking through the woods thoroughly enjoying the perfect weather and the serenity of nature. Then you are jolted into a salvo of fear – by an unmistakable sound. The tail...
View ArticleWhat Really Drives Connection?
We often say that healthy communication is the cornerstone of a great relationship, but is it? Neuroscience has helped us evaluate what really drives connection in relationship. We know the brain...
View Article8 Ways to Put Sex Therapists Out of Business
I’ve been a sex therapist for 39 years. That’s over 40,000 sessions with individuals and couples – from every conceivable background, with every imaginable problem. And yet all those sessions, with all...
View ArticleRelief or Happiness – What Do You Choose?
I work with a lot of couples where one partner takes great pride in being a problem solver. I, too, am a big believer in solving problems. Yet, after all my years of working with all kinds of couples,...
View ArticleThe gift of a stronger connection and a stronger union
Create some quiet uninterrupted time and space to do this exercise with your partner. Imagine if your partner focused on bringing out the best in you. Each partner has different talents, skills, and...
View ArticleThe Labyrinth of Love – The Path to a Soulful Relationship
By Chelsea Wakefield, PhD, LCSW Chelsea Wakefield is an Associate Professor and Director of the Couples Center at the Psychiatric Research Institute of the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences,...
View ArticleSurprising marriage lesson from a palm tree climber – it’s not pruning
I am writing from Hawaii, Ellyn’s and my favorite place to reorganize, reprioritize, and regenerate. I was walking back to our unit and stopped to watch a gardener climb a very tall and quite thin...
View ArticleWhat Is Your Love Language?
Has it ever dawned on you that your partner may not experience love the same way you do? If you have been together a while, you may have figured this out by now. Lest there be any doubt, a great...
View ArticleBuilding Your Child’s Confidence: Creative Determination
“It’s hard to beat a person who never gives up.” – Babe Ruth My uncle Neil was born and raised to be a rancher. He spent his entire life ranching in Afton, Wyoming. Like all successful ranchers,...
View ArticleWhat Would You March For?
Dateline Hong Kong August 18, 2019 Protestor March, 5:03 PM I am standing in front of a mall in the middle of Hong Kong as thousands of marchers parade by me in the rain. No violence. No threats. No...
View ArticleHello Undifferentiated Self
In the Bader-Pearson Developmental Model of Couples therapy, you may hear about differentiation. But what is it? This blog post includes the poem, “Undifferentiated Self,” which touches on...
View ArticlePete’s Interview – Stages of Relationships – Triggers
Thanks for your interest in my recent interview on NPR. I hope you get some valuable insights for your relationship regarding: The stages of a relationship or marriage Lies we tell our partners...
View ArticleThe Cookie Jar Marriage
The cookie jar is an interesting concept. It’s so much more than a storage container! It’s where kids head for an immediate snack when feeling down or to celebrate when feeling great. Know what? We...
View ArticleA grave digger’s perspective about one kind of marriage
I used to be a grave digger. College summer job. No heavy equipment. Just two good shovels, pick axe, tape measure, string, and a tarp. I wasn’t that philosophical then. I could not have imagined that...
View ArticleTeamwork: From now on if someone calls me chicken . . .
From now on if someone calls me “chicken,” I'll take that as a huge compliment. For any person – especially a male – being called chicken is a searing insult. But not for me. Not anymore. Not after...
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